It's been 2 weeks since my last post, which was short and sweet and took me less than 5 minutes to complete. I can't seem to find the time to blog anymore which is upsetting because I love it so much. Blogging is like my therapy, my way to let it all out and feel better. It's my way to relate to other Mom's that lives their lives very similar to mine and helps me to feel normal.
I literally had to bring everything to a screeching halt and throw a fit like an infant to get to sit here and write this post at this very moment. Laundry, dishes, dirty bathrooms, unmopped and toy sterwn floors will still be there waiting for me when I am finished and I can pick up where I left off feeling relieved to 'let it all out'.
Around 20 minutes ago Kyle turned a month old. I, like every other mom, wonders where the time goes so quickly?! I can remember the events of my oldest daughters birth like it was yesterday, and now she is 7 1/2 years old and will be in the 2nd grade in just a few weeks. I am so proud of the young lady she is growing into. Yesterday morning I was getting ready to wash a sink load of dishes when she asked me if she could wash them for me. I let her, and she seemed to enjoy it. I am glad she offers to help me. I appreciate all the extra fingers that are lifted to help me out especially when it's volunteered. Four kids is a lot of work. I hardly ever have time to sit down and just rest. But, that's okay. I enjoy staying busy, it keeps my mind off of negative things which is where it always seems to wander when I have the time to think.
Our Summer hasn't been eventful, far from it. We have stayed home mostly other than taking the kids swimming a few times. I don't mind not being able to take trips. Sure, I'd like to but, we are now a family of 6 with one income. I hate that my husband stays so stressed about money. He makes enough to keep the bills paid, clothes on our backs and food in our bellies and that's enough to be grateful for. One day, I will have a job and can help out around here, money wise. But, for now, I am doing what I feel is best and that's staying at home with our children trying to raise them with good morals. I can't imagine always having to be on the go while my kids are at a daycare. It works for some families, but not for us.
I am having surgery in a few weeks to have my tubes tied. We have mutually decided we are done having kids and feel that a permanent form of birth control is the option that best suits us. I never ever in my wildest dreams imagined myself having four children. But, now that I do, I can't imagine not having four children. I still get plenty of "you have how many kids?" "Bless your heart", "You look like a baby yourself", comments that I try my best to shrug off and not let get to me. The thought of never being able to have more children saddens me but, we just simply can not afford more and now that our numbers are even I would like to keep it that way. One day I hope to fulfill my dream of becoming a Preschool teacher, I imagine that would be hard to if our family continued to grow bigger than it already is. I am blessed beyond words to have the children I do, and thank God every day for them.
I feel like this post is scattered in topics, but it's been so long since I got to blog what I was feeling I am not sure where to end or what to include. So, I will leave you with a few pictures from our Summer and keep my fingers crossed that I can find the time to blog again soon.
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