Tug of War Mommy

"Momma, I want some chocolate milk"

"Momma, I need help with homework, I don't understand it"

"wah-wah" Translation: I need a bottle.

"Momma, Caleb hit me"

"Momma, I'm thirsty"

"Momma, she won't share the computer."

"Momma, we are hungry and there is nothing here to eat"

"Momma, come wipe me I have diarrhea"

"Momma, will you fix me something to eat, I'm hungry"

"wah-wah" Translation: I need a dry diaper

"Momma, Caleb is coloring on the walls"

"Momma, I need a pull up"

"Momma, I want some Kool-aid"

"Momma, book fair is tomorrow at school, can we have money?"

"wah-wah" Translation: Hold me

"Momma, I pooped"

"Momma, where is the charger to my ipod?"

"Momma, Caleb is bothering the computer again"

"Momma, I want to play basketball, the money is due Friday"

"Momma, I can't find my favorite shorts"

"wah-wah" Traslation: I need another bottle.

"Momma, I wanna watch Spongebob, no wait, Toy Story! no wait, Spongebob."

"Momma, Caleb is trying to push the tv off in the floor"

"Momma, can we play the PSP?

"Momma, when you go to Walmart can you buy me the new Barbie fashion hair designer?"

"wah-wah" Translation: I pooped in my diaper and I want it off.

"Momma, Caleb is getting into the medicine cabinet"

"Momma, My belly hurts."

"Momma, Sissy won't let me play with her toy"

"Momma, Caleb is pulling my hair"

"wah-wah" Translation: It's time for some baby food.

"Momma, Can you turn on the Wii for us?

"Momma, we are bored there is nothing to do here"

"Momma, Caleb is trying to poke out Kyle's eye"

"Momma, can I have $5.00?"

"Momma, I want some Kool-aid, no wait, chocolate milk, nah just get me kool aid.

"Momma, can you warm us up some pizza rolls?"

"wah-wah" Translation: I need a nap.

"Momma, Momma, Momma, Momma, Momma"

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" Translation: THERE IS ONE OF ME AND THERE IS FOUR OF YOU. YOU HAVE TO WAIT YOUR TURN, THE BABY COMES FIRST. YOU HAVE A DADDY TOO, GO ASK HIM! AND BEFORE ASKING PLEASE MAKE SURE YOU KNOW WHAT YOU WANT. I AM RAISING FOUR KIDS ON ONE INCOME I AM NOT MADE OUT OF MONEY AND SINCE THERE ISN'T A MONEY TREE GROWING IN THE BACKYARD YOU ARE EITHER GOING TO HAVE TO GET A JOB OR LEARN THAT YOU CAN'T HAVE EVERYTHING. CALEB IF I HAVE TO GET AFTER YOU ONE MORE TIME YOU ARE GETTING A SPANKING AND GOING TO TIME OUT. WE HAVE 3 COMPUTERS, AN XBOX, PLAYSTATION 3, PSP, WII AND EVERYONE IN THE HOUSE HAS THEIR OWN IPOD AND ALL THE TOYS A CHILD COULD POSSIBLY WANT, THERE IS NO REASON TO BE BORED! NOW FIND SOMETHING TO DO BESIDE STAY UNDER MY FEET AND GET ON MY NERVES. YOU COULD ALWAYS GO CLEAN YOUR ROOM. AND BEFORE YOU ASK ME WHERE SOMETHING IS YOU COULD ACTUALLY LOOK FOR IT YOURSELF FIRST. IT'S NOT GOING TO JUMP OUT AT YOU. WE ARE NEVER OUT OF FOOD, FOR THAT WE ARE BLESSED, PLEASE LEARN TO FIX YOUR OWN SNACK. A MICROWAVE AND TOASTER IS NOT ROCKET SCIENCE. NOW WHERE IS MY TYLENOL AND PROZAC, MOMMY HAS A HEADACHE!